Throughout this book, you will meet with me on several occasion for coffee while I tell you about the events that shaped my life and how they affected me. I hope I did justice to my family.
I don’t remember every detail of my past and wish people wouldn’t ask. I blocked out a lot and what is mentioned here is what I remember how things were. I know that I am the last girl out of the original family I was born into, and that everyone has left me here to face life by myself.
Poem from book:
I Carried The Hate, Instead
Ever since I could remember
There has always been a feeling
Of a dark void of disappointment
I always felt that I was never good enough
For anyone to be around,
I would carry the burden of all my family’s mishaps,
I guess that’s why I was born,
To be the one, to last and to be the one to carry it all,
Like Christ carry the cross, I carried the hate instead
I carried it on my shoulders
I carried it in my heart
I bared the burden of everyone’s mistakes
I was judged, kicked, laughed and rumored
When all I ever wanted was to fit in
Their sins became my sins
That I packed and stuffed away
For years I wasn’t me
I was them.